Anger, it is a feeling that burns inside of us. The best of dictionaries define anger by giving synonyms or describing it as an extreme of other feelings because it is virtually unexplainable. Yet we allow something so toxic to exist, fester and control us. Anger is referred to as a “boiling point” which speaks to a piling up of emotions over time. MTV’s boiling points showed that people only lash out after one exceeds the threshold of their capacity to be annoyed. If you provoke someone constantly for long enough, you will get the reaction you are looking for. Don’t you wish we lived in a world where you got paid for staying calm when people work on your last nerve?
People do things that affect each other’s lives so we get offended and carry around anger in varying degrees, towards each other. It is only fair that we acknowledge that we are sometimes the reason for someone else’s anger. Friends say hurtful things in jest, teenagers feel the need to bully people who do not conform to the norm, fathers leave their children etc. Everyone has their own examples which range from isolated moments of insensitivity which evoke surface anger or hurtful experiences which brew anger into bitterness. Anger is a dictator. People who have short tempers admit to acting blindly in fits of rage under the influence of anger.
We barely talk about the anger we feel towards ourselves. Guilt and shame over hurting our loved ones leads to anger at ourselves. This can make us feel like we must cause ourselves pain so we self-harm as a result or leading to greater mental health issues such as depression. At the first sign of a deterioration in mental health, it is important to seek help from professionals.
Negative self-talk is also harmful as it puts you on a downward spiral constantly of doubting yourself and the possibilities for your future. Feelings of inadequacy make one decide to isolate themselves. Feeling so small that you begin to take advice from anyone, regardless of how damaging their insights are, is also not always the positive route to go.
Anger is a force and when it strikes it can leave permanent damage. Take the steps to loosen anger’s grip. Our next long post will focus on dealing with anger.
You were never made to hold fire.